I feel defeted

Hi and welcome! I am glad you found this community, especially now when you are feeling down. Loving ourselves isn't always easy. We are our own worst critics. Sometimes, we need help seeing the good in ourselves and learning to embrace it.
Have you considered talking with someone about how you feel? It can be hard to discuss something so deeply personal with the people closest to us, so it might be more effective and more comfortable to find a good therapist. It might take a while to find the right match, but therapy can be a great tool for changing your perspective.
Here is a wonderful article from one of our health leaders about navigating that road to self-love: https://obesity.net/living/living-well. I hope you find it helpful.
Please know we're here for you. You are among people who get it. Gentle hugs. - Lori (Team Member)